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In July I went to LA to see my best friend Dixie Comet marry the love of her life. While I was there I didn’t accomplish much because I was dealing with that insanely low temperature, adrenal exhaustion and thyroid thing however I was sure to to keep my shoot scheduled with the first man to ever suspend me in 2007 (Don Sir) who much later become a lover and loved one. Although the relationship was not meant to last we’ve always had a beautiful relationship with rope. There was never any expectation to create bondage clips or do something that sold because it wasn’t a business for him. There was never any acting or pretending to be mad or sad or in pain like there is often times when making clips. It was always just two people that truly enjoyed bondage and hosiery challenging one another and making memories simply with a camera. I had no worries that I would ruin the shoot if I got too sick and weak. I had no worries about putting on a show. I HOPED that I had what it takes to withstand the types of ties I always enjoyed with him but I knew that even if I bailed on the first tie there would be no hard feelings and we would still enjoy the evening catching up. There were others I wanted to be tied up by on the trip, but they are in the business of DID clips and I wasn’t willing to try and fail and get myself all worked up about it. This day I laid in the bed until he arrived conserving energy. The next day I stayed in the bed almost day recovering (temperature was in the 96.4 range) not conducive to physical and mental challenges but I’m happy to say I did pretty ok and I felt good because my dear from Suzi came and did my makeup. The hardest part for me was that suspension- simply the rope digging into my plush flesh above the knee and oddly enough not the elbows bound with breast bondage, which makes elbow bondage more challenging (for me).

For those of you who have been emailing about my doctors appointment, some of you even curious about my condition because of a loved on that seems to be suffering similarly I’ll elaborate more about the get well process in a journal update very soon. I did the right thing not making any rash decisions and waiting for the specialist. I can see and feel myself coming back to life shall we say, although there are often disheartening reminders that I have a long way to go but that is life.

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